Apostles

The 3 Apostles were created when the god 4chan was able to hack into the universal constant and bestow 3 absolutes onto new souls. The 3 absolutes were having enough... Brutus received the Strength, Hans received the Time, and Hohenheim received the Knowledge. With these powers, Brutus would always be powerful enough to accomplish a task. If something came down to moving an impossibly heavy object, his strength would grow to accommodate the challenge. Hans would be able to slow and stop time to perfectly evaluate a situation, he could think about the best way to react to something for hundreds of years without anyone else experiencing a second of time passing. Hohenheim knew how to do anything he put his mind to, meaning if he asked himself how to do something, it would be clear to him like a distant memory suddenly becoming clear.
 * 1) Strength
 * 2) Time
 * 3) Knowledge

Though Hans and Hohenheim were stuck on Epic, because Brutus accumulated so much strength over thousands of years he was able to merge into alternate universes which eventually led to him meeting the greater god Winrar, and thus began his apostle contract.